UK humps donkeys
*Question of the day: Whatthehell?
*Position of the day (this portion of the post dedicated to Krista and her sexual acrobatics) : Flying Superman
*Song of the day: "Trouble" by Coldplay
*Pig of the day: Walter
Alright, except for the waffles with strawberries and whipped cream, this day has been stupid. I feel ashamed for having lived it. I'm sitting here missing Chris so bad that I can't breathe and don't really feel like going out. No hockey game for me tonight. I think I'll just get into bed with a book or movie or something and go to sleep. I'm bummed out b/c Laurin's grandfather is sick and I'm worried. Also, I didn't get to talk to Bickett tonight despite the fact that he's home...*sigh*...oh well, hopefully tomorrow.
The main thought of my day has been "What ever happened to Robert Stack? Is there life after Unsolved Mysteries?"
I think there's a very good chance that I'll get up early tomorrow and go run. I need to get some stress out from this past week and from the week coming up. Is UK trying to kill me?
I triple dog dare anyone that reads this post to email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and say hello to me. You can tell me that I suck, or that I'm wonderful, or that you're sorry you stalked me, or that you're thankful that I helped you write your paper, or that you miss me and will see me tomorrow or (if you're in England) in some undisclosed number of days. Any form of feedback is acceptable!
mandypants [11:40 PM]
Like Sands Through the Hourglass...
I am having a GHETTO FABOLOUS day...
On tap in the 112:
Peaches and Cream ~ 112
Holla Back ~ Fabolous
Caress Me Down ~ Sublime
Hip Hop Hooray ~ Naughty by Nature
Superwoman ~ Lil Mo feat. Fabolous
So now you have an idea of the crap that I'm listening to. Actually, I shouldn't call it that. It's not THAT bad. It's not COUNTRY. Anyway, I've been getting my ass in gear and I hit the Journalism building early today to look for scholarships (hopefully in St. Louis) over the summer.
~Jordan update (I swear I talk more about her than myself and this is supposed to be MY PAGE!!!): she's been watching soap operas and now she's just sitting at her computer. She's going home this weekend, along with every other UK student besides ME...I will be studying like a little bitch so I can go home the next weekend to SWEET HOME PADUCAH! Also, she dazzled me a few minutes ago with her ability to do a hand stand and stay in that position for several mintues. I am rooming with a gymnast! WOO HOO!
Thought for the day:You can lead a horse to water, but it's way more fun to just push him into a huge vaght of TENNESSEE WHISKEY! DRINK UP, BOYS! ITS FRIDAY!!!
mandypants [12:05 PM]
::.Serendipity and Gangsta Bitch Barbie.::
*QUOTE OF THE DAY: "I'm gonna be on you like chocolate on a turkey!" - my messed up interpretation of a lyric
*Jordan Status: currently sleeping like the little angel that she is
*Issue of the day: female infanticide (the murder of female children, especially in 3rd world countries, because the parents want a male child and females are seen as a burden)
*Good deed for the day: driving a friend to the K-lot at 1am so she wouldn't have to walk back alone in the cold
~*~After a fulfilling day of classes (my womens studies and Sociology always get me riled up) I decided to give myself a little break. Laurin, Katie, and I went to see Serendipity. My analysis of this film, you ask? Well, it's a definite chick flick but it would be a decent date movie. It's perfect for a girls nite out. We only payed a dollar to see it, so it's guilt free. My only qualm was the lead female...she had a British accent that could possibly be fake. I can never tell unless Chris points them out for me.
~*~Bickett is still out of town at All-State band (congrats, buddy!) but I've been emailing him religiously every day so that he is up to date when he returns!
~*~My Sociology class had a 30 minute discussion tonight on Barbie and whether or not she encourages little girls to adopt feminist views. After listening to bullshit about how she is a positive role model because she is multi-cultural and in various careers, I decided to put my 2 cents in. I reminded my classmates that her feet are deformed (stuck permanently in that ever-sexy high-heeled position that we all find so comfortable), she is top heavy (no proportional woman would be able to even sit up), and that she's just as much a doctor in that sexed up uniform with a mini-skirt as Britney fucking Spears is a soldier in her camo halter top. That stuff about Barbie is CRAP. What was I like as a little girl, you ask? I used to pop her head off and try to flush it. As for the rest of the body, straight to the microwave, as featured in the video "Black Hole Sun." DOWN WITH BARBIE!
~*~My name and a quotation from me were in the paper today. Woo hoo. They used the dumbest thing I said in the whole interview. "I think it's a good chance for a laugh and to make new friends." Wankers. They so took that out of context.
~*~By the way, just to make this perfectly clear, when reading a number such as .0085, please read this "point zero, zero, eight, five" and do NOT say "O". O is a letter of the alphabet, you MORON...ZERO is the number you are trying to reference. Thank you.
~*~Only one class stands between me and my weekend. The plan this weekend is to spend as much time as possible studying and writing papers so that I don't DIE come Monday. As soon as class is over tomorrow morning, I'm coming back and sleeping. To disturb me would be to stick a large electric cattle prod up Godzilla's ass and then smile at him while you await your demise. Not a good idea.
~*~I would like to give a shout out to a certain young man that helped me today by eavesdropping on my stalker and later by pissing him off royally. Thank you, kind sir. You fucking rule.
~*~I would also like to give a special "Kick some ASS" cheer to Sally on her chemistry test. I'm sure the results will make you smile that gorgeous smile of yours...you rule girl!
Alright, well, it's way past my bedtime and there's a certain black hoodie waiting for me to cuddle with it. Walter (my stuffed pig) has been begging me to come back to bed all day. I warned him to quit bitching or it was the bacon factory for him. He shut up. Goodnight, dear friend. Don't think that today was the worst day of your life...there's always tomorrow!
mandypants [1:50 AM]
Lasagna and Krista's Karma-Sutra
*Current Mood: Exhausted and Giddy
*Color of Toenails: "Rebellion" (a sort of burgandy glitter)
*Food I would eat if I were at home: Mud Cookies (no-bake oatmeal cookies) :.yum yum.:
*Barometric Pressure: 30.73f , whatever the hell that means...
I actually watched the last part of that disgusting game between the beloved Wildcats and those horrible orange bastards...that game makes me sick all over...we're talking HIVES here people. For those of you that don't know, they got us 76-74 in overtime and then their redneck inbred fans rushed the floor. What a bunch of muckrackers. I don't want to talk about it anyomre.
I did however spend a considerable part of my afternoon watching the snow fall and reading a bit from an article entitled "What is Feminism?" Don't opress me anymore you...OPRESSOR! I think I'll do an extra good job shaving my legs tomorrow just to reassure everyone of my feminist yet not outrageously man-hating wacko ideas.
~*~The hilight of my day has been the vegetable lasagna at K-lair that Jordan and I had earlier. As for the rest of the evening, Krista from across the hall divulged to us the secrets of the Karma-Sutra and actually attempted to reinact them in the middle of our floor. The longer I am in this dorm room the more I swear that the walls are closing in on me...
~*~Oh and by the way, I apparently have a stalker now. He can read this b/c the address is posted on my IM profile. Whoever you are, I don't remember you from middle school, I am not going to meet you tomorrow at any time, and I don't want your rose. Stop talking to me unless you wish to tell me your identity. There is a reward being offered by the creator of this page as to the identity of her stalker. He may turn himself in for the reward. Good Lord...I TOLD you that my life needed to be documented.
~*~As to the issue of Jordan (my roommate) and Katie (the blonde Pre-Pharm major down the hall) and their bet; I place my money on Jordan. Maybe Valentine's Day won't be so bad this year for you KATESTER! MUA HAHAHAHA
Also relating to Valentine's Day: I have decided to make myself a guinea pig for a grand experiment in Valentine's Day HATING. A certain cafe on campus is having a little fun on V-Day (not victory day for all you veterans...geez...) entitled "The Hating Game." I am going to participate in an effort to liven up my experience and have a good memory of the day to go with all those hostile an lonely ones. Hey, I might even get free cheesecake! A guy from the Kernel already contacted me and wants to put me in an article. Holy crap, I'm gonna go campus wide with my MORONIC SHENANNIGANS!
Jordan update: she's getting ready for bed by doing Pilates (a sadistic body twisting kind of yoga) in our floor. This involves a series of crunch like movements with groaning as the muscles in her stomach slowly tear. Oh dear, she's rolling around on the floor now and counting under her breath. "Oh, this hurts like hell, but I am determined to look good in my bathing suit!!!" Keep it up, Jordana Jordana Bana Dana...you're a real trooper! *cue the theme to Rocky*
As I close the book on yet another day here at UK, I realize that the longer I am here, my heart dies a little more. Now if i could just get to work on killing my liver and brain stem, too, I'd be in grand shape.
mandypants [1:42 AM]
So here I sit in Starbucks (oh shut up, this is only the third time this semester...I am SO not addicted) just sipping a Chai and wondering how I got here. Well, not here exactly. I walked over from my journalism class. I mean to this exact spot of my life. Every moment of my life has led up to this point and all I can think of is how I'd just LOVE to take a nap right now. It's so freaking cold outside that the only activity that seems appropriate is to sleep it off. At least my alarm clock went off this morning. Yesterday was all jacked up because I woke up late and had to rush to get ready. Nothing is worse than having to get out of bed realizing that you are already late.
There is a little huddle of high school students outside the window of the Student Center that are apparently taking a tour of UK. I want to open the window and yell out to them..."DO NOT COME HERE! IT IS HORRIBLE! ITS ALL LIES! LIES I TELL YOU!" Sadly, they will be lured here. They will be seduced by the basketball tickets, the academic programs, and the appearance that people on this campus actually care about them. UK looks so friendly and inviting on a tour. It really does. I learned the real truth my first week of school here. It sucks just like everywhere else.
I think I'll go back to my pathetic little dorm room and do some studying. All my professors have decided to give tests and assignments during the same week (thanks so much). Story of my life.
mandypants [12:02 PM]